take courage when the road is long.

It was the middle of a work afternoon last March when I found out about Luongo being traded back to Florida; I checked twitter, saw confirmation, saw the infamous @strombone1 palm tree tweet, and then my phone blew up with a variety of text messages from all over, from anyone and everyone.  It Finally Happened.

I can’t remember everyone’s exact reactions — shock, mostly — because trading Luongo over the course of  a couple of seasons had proven to be difficult and then all of a sudden he was gone,  just like that.  Good on ya, Torts.  Way to be. I had gotten past the idea of being upset about Luongo not being on my team. All I wanted was for him to be happy somewhere else because clearly that wasn’t the case here, not anymore. Continue reading “take courage when the road is long.”

everybody put your best suit or dress on.

A year ago, when I was 29 and just shy of my 30th birthday, I didn’t expect that I’d start the new year off almost virtually rock bottom.  After roughly two weeks off from work over the holidays, I went back to work at a job that had heightened my anxiety over the course of the year, but I went back with a positive outlook to turn things around and convince myself that it would be okay.  That lasted until I was fired just three days after coming back from holidays, and thus catapulted Jocelyn’s Sinking Ship.

I spent a month unemployed, my first time ever as an adult, which was also my first time being fired from a job in the field I was working in; I was mortified of the possibility of still being unemployed by the time my 30th birthday rolled around in late February, but I accepted the first job I was offered and started exactly two weeks before the big Three-Oh. I honestly don’t know what I was more relieved about, though: the fact that I’d gotten a job,  or that I’d gotten it before I turned 30.

Continue reading “everybody put your best suit or dress on.”

The red fire truck.

I was watching TV one night recently and, as the holidays are nearing,  commercials are littered with gift ideas and other holiday themes. For some reason, the channel I was watching threw a commercial for Barbies into the mix (no, I wasn’t watching a kid’s channel), and it dawned on me that I hadn’t seen commercials for children’s toys in a very long time.  Not having kids will do that, I guess.

Anyway, it dawned on me that, as a girl, while I didn’t dislike girl toys, like barbies — I had my fair share of them, believe-you me– or the Easy Bake Oven — I think I actually had two of those, but I got much more excited over toy cars (Hot Wheels), LEGO, G.I. Joes, He-Man toys, almost more than anything.

Which brings me to the red fire truck — my most prized-possession as a child. Continue reading “The red fire truck.”

Years teach us patience.

I’m never going to finish school. I’ll be here ’till I’m 30.”

I wrote this in an online journal entry on March 11, 2005, which was almost ten years ago and, clearly, the idea of being at school until the age of 30 was the Worst Thing Ever to a then 21-year old me.

Well, 21-year-old Jocelyn, the joke is on you, my friend.

Continue reading “Years teach us patience.”

Never be bullied into silence.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been made to feel insecure by other women, but recently it happened and it’s stupid and silly and I need to talk about it.

First, let me tell you something. I love the colour red: I have (unnatural) red hair. I wear red lipstick. I have a red purse. I have a red toque, numerous red scarves, assorted red clothing, red tights, red nail polish. It’s endless and it’s the one colour that I feel the most confident in. I don’t wear it, or red lipstick, to mask some sort of insecurity — it’s quite the opposite, really — I just feel like it brings out some level of confidence in me that I already had, it just needed something to show the way. The colour is ‘me’, and so many people I know associate me with it. I love that.

Continue reading “Never be bullied into silence.”

Even the best fall down sometimes.

I made it six weeks into the journalism program before I cried, doubted my abilities and heavily considered if I’m really cut out for this.

I’ve written two midterm exams this week — one in my Media & Society class, the other in my Political Science class. I felt okay after the Media and Society midterm, which entailed reviewing a journalism article and whether it was considered ‘good’ or ‘bad’ journalism, together with 3 short answer questions we had to write.  After discussing the contents of the exam today in class, my confidence level dropped.  I completely misinterpreted how I was supposed to write the essay in response to the article, and maybe did half okay-ish on the short answer questions. This discussion came after the poli sci midterm, which I also do not feel very confident about.

So, I broke down.

Continue reading “Even the best fall down sometimes.”